


Where the Stars Can See Us

by TallDarkandNerdy



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, I'm a sucker for Yuri taking the initiative, It's sweet I stg, M/M, Set between episodes 4 and 5, Stargazing, tfw a show wrecks your life, very light angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-09-08 15:24:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8850172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TallDarkandNerdy/pseuds/TallDarkandNerdy
Summary: There were so many things Yuri had dreamt of telling Victor the Idol in the past, so many opportunities he missed because of his own anxiety. But looking up into the face of Victor the Coach, with the stars glowing behind him, he was calm.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a writing challenge between me and [Runetooth](http://rune-tooth.tumblr.com) on tumblr for the word "regret." I can't get enough of them helping Yuri through his anxiety in canon or the thought of Yuri taking the initiative for most of their milestones, so this was inevitable.
> 
> Runetooth's half of the challenge can be read [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8889829) (and it's also really good, 10/10)!

_About next season. I think…it would be better if you found a different coach._

_Wait…I’ll get better. Don’t leave—_

_I’m sorry, Yuri…_

_No! Victor—!_

Yuri jolted up from his bed with a cry. Another nightmare—another night where Yuri’s fears ravaged his subconscious.

Some nights he was back on the rink in Sochi, with his hands and knees glued to the ice. Other nights he sat in an empty movie theatre and watched every fall he’s had since he first started skating with Nishigori and Yuko. Tonight’s dream only lingered in quick flashes of blue and silver, but he still shivered and clutched his hand to his chest.

Reality hit Yuri after the fifth or six inhale, and he remembered where he was and who was sleeping only a few feet down the hall. Makkachin was curled at the bottom of the bed; his snores were the only indication that he was still asleep. They were still there. He wasn’t alone yet.

As carefully as he could without disturbing the dog, Yuri turned to his side and fumbled in the dark until his fingers wrapped around his phone. He tapped the home screen button, but had to squint from the unpleasant floodlight and waited until his eyes adjusted to check the time.

_4:30 am_. He had practice in four hours.

He stuffed his phone under his pillow and lay his head back down. He closed his eyes to fall back asleep; _Victor’s hands clenched the side of the rink as Yuri flubbed another toe jump, and couldn’t meet his gaze when--_

_No!_ Yuri groaned and buried his face into his pillowcase. _Think about something else!_

Hasetsu’s sunrises; Vicchan; Makkachin; Victor _…_ Across the room, Victor smiled brightly through the glass of a picture frame. How long will he be able to have the real smile greet him every morning?

There was no way he could fall asleep yet. He slipped out of his room minutes later, Makkachin tucked in with his blanket, and jogged out into the brisk night air.

Hasetsu at night was even quieter and more deserted than it was in the middle of the day—perfect for walks through town to ease his insomnia. It was cool on the boardwalk, even with summer just beginning, and the consistent breeze over the water made it one of his favorite areas on his route.

He paused to take a breath and look out over the water, letting his lungs take in gasps of sea salt air while his breathing steadied. The waves were rapid tonight, but shimmered from the full moon and the spatter of stars. His nightmare seemed so small and insignificant in comparison to the universe’s light.

Yuri rested his elbows against the top of the railing and craned his neck back to admire the constellations. He didn’t know how long he’d been out there when echoing footsteps approached him.

“You’re going to get sick if you stand out here all night.” The voice caught Yuri off-guard, and when he turned Victor was smiling a few feet away; Makkachin was diligently beside him, his tail rustling the sidewalk’s debris with each wag.

“Victor!” Victor smiled wider at his name and chuckled, walking closer. Makkachin circled Yuri excitedly and leapt on his hind legs to balance on the man’s side. “What are you doing up?”

“Makka kept whining at my door,” he explained, and leaned next to Yuri on the railing. “I think he was lonely.” He didn’t ask, but Yuri knew he was waiting for an explanation.

He apologized; it was a response that somehow became automatic in his conversations. “I’m sorry. I had a nightmare, and couldn’t fall asleep.”

Victor looked genuinely surprised. “Are you okay now?” he asked, and sighed in relief when Yuri nodded. “That’s good…I used to have terrible nightmares when I was a child,” he consoled, turning his fatigue-hooded gaze in his direction. “Sometimes life got so hectic, it’d take it out on my dreams.”

“Really?” They exchanged glances, and Yuri belatedly realized how little space there was between them when he noticed the light red flush along the bridge of Victor’s nose.

“Awful ones.” His expression seemed worn from the memory, but then his eyes trailed up to the sky and his mouth hung open. “Wow…you don’t get to see the stars like this in St. Petersburg,” he whispered, as though raising his voice would ruin the moment. “No wonder you come out here to calm down.” Yuri smiled for the first time that night, oddly proud of the stars that hung over his seaside.

They spent most of their stargazing in silence—the only consistent sound was the crash of waves against the shoreline—until Victor finally spoke up. “Are you going to tell me what’s really wrong yet?”

He blinked and glanced over at Victor, who was staring back with an unidentifiable expression on his face. “Nothing’s wrong…? Not anymore, at least.”

It was hard to tell what Victor was thinking, even as he smiled and tapped his thumb against his chin. “Hm! Lying doesn’t suit you, Yuri~”

“I’m not—!”

“Then tell Coach Victor what’s troubling you,” he laughed, but he directed his full attention to him. There was no way Yuri could evade answering with Victor leaning closer and trying to make eye contact.

“I’ve been thinking.”

“About?” Yuri looked away sheepishly, and didn’t answer. “Yuri,” Victor insisted.

“About my performance last year,” he admitted. He could sense Victor shifting at the reply, but he couldn’t look over. “I don’t want this season to be like that.”

“It won’t be. No season’s results are identical,” Victor replied, and petted Makkachin’s ear when his hand was head-butted. “We learn from our experiences, Yuri.”

Yuri’s fingernails scratched over the worn wood railing. “I should’ve tried harder,” he insisted, regret tinged in his tone. “I was nervous.”

“It was your first time in the Grand Prix. You had every right to be.”

“But I shouldn’t have let it ruin my scores! What if it happens again,” he asked hurriedly, not noticing the frown etched onto Victor’s face. He didn’t have the natural talent Victor had. Or Phichit, or Yurio. Even with his practice…

Victor’s eyes narrowed, his posture straightening the longer Yuri continued. “Yuri.”

“What if I’m not cut out for this?”

“Yuri—”

“I’m wasting your time—” Yuri started, but suddenly his collar was tugged until he was forced to meet Victor’s stare. The boardwalk was dark and empty except for them, with only the moon to provide enough light for Yuri to see Victor’s face. His smile was gone, but there was no sign of malice in his expression or in the hold of his fist against his shirt.

“You,” he said slowly, “are never a waste of my time.” It was in the way Victor never broke eye contact as he said this, and the way his hand loosened and curled up to cup his cheek as though he were something precious, that made Yuri realize how lucky he was.

Victor must’ve taken Yuri’s lack of a reaction as hesitation, because his eyes sharpened in determination and his hands tightened their hold. “No more regrets, Yuri. I won’t let you doubt yourself.”

There were so many things Yuri had dreamt of telling Victor the Idol in the past, so many opportunities he missed because of his own anxiety. But looking up into the face of Victor the Coach, with the stars glowing behind him, he was calm when he reached up to settle his hand over Victor’s. “No more regrets,” he repeated. “I promise.”

Victor’s eyes widened, but the smile that broke out on his face told Yuri he said the right thing. “I didn’t expect any other answer from you,” he murmured, but his playful tone returned and his hand shifted under Yuri’s so he could twine their fingers together.

They leaned against each other’s shoulders until the sun peeked over the horizon and reflected against the ocean in hues of gold. It was the most beautiful sunrise Yuri had ever seen.

“So, Yuri!” Victor walked in step with him as they strolled back to the hot springs. Even without much sleep, he had a bounce to his step and a mirthful glimmer in his eyes. “Since you don’t have anymore regrets, you won’t mind me asking why you have a framed photograph of me on your desk?”

“ _What?!_ ”

“Don’t worry, it’s not a bad picture! But why—Yuri? Yuri! Wait up!”

* * *

Yuri still had practice the next day, and Victor still made sure he upheld his promise.

“That was a good effort,” Victor said when he overspun one of his toe jumps. He skated around him and nudged his shoulder when he saw Yuri looking down at his skates with an impatient look. “You had better height this time!”

“Yeah…” He dusted the ice shavings off his blades, but couldn’t shake the slip off. Why didn’t he count his spins? If this happened at Nationals--

Victor caught the look quickly. “Yuri, stop overthinking.” Yuri could feel himself bristle automatically, his nerves still jarred by the bout of anxiety, but Victor leaned closer anyway and waited for him to calm down. He brushed Yuri’s bangs out of his face when he received the silent permission to touch him. “What was our promise?” he asked softly. Intimately, with the way his fingertips lingered over Yuri’s temple. His eyes were calming, fluid like the ocean.

Yuri swallowed, but straightened up on his skates to match Victor’s height. “No more regrets.”

Victor gave him another pleased, dazzling smile, and pushed himself backwards. “That’s my boy. Once more, from the top. With Fluidity! Love’s fluid, remember!”

Yuri nodded, and got into position while Victor steered to the side and started the track from the beginning. The piano riff sounded so gentle in Hasetsu’s Ice Castle, as if it understood that its first notes originated there years before. Yuri moved with the piano’s dance, this time focusing on his time with Victor. On his smile. On the shimmer in his eyes when he and Yuri warm up before practice.

The final chords came too quickly, but he managed to finish with a flourish and stretched his hand out in time with the final note. He heaved a breath, but even in his pose his eyes strained to get a glimpse of Victor’s reaction.

Yuri didn’t have to wait long to see it. “Beautiful,” Victor praised when he skated back to him, and circled him on the ice to inspect his posture for any sprains. “Look at you. Transforming your body and your performance…” His tone was wistful, his smile matching it as he reached up and cupped both of Yuri’s cheeks.

Yuri’s eyes widened comically; he could feel everything Victor wasn’t saying through the stroke of his face. _Don’t be afraid; it was beautiful._

_You’re beautiful._

Yuri slipped his hands around the back of Victor’s neck and, before Victor’s smile could slip off in confusion, tugged until their foreheads bumped together and their lips met. There wasn’t a cinematic kiss with fireworks or explosions, but Victor’s hands slipped into his hair and pulled him closer. It was perfect.

They pulled back hurriedly only after they heard a surprised gasp near the back door of the rink; Yuri twisted around only to see the back of Yuko’s head as she apologized and hurried back through the entryway.

“Wow,” Victor laughed breathlessly. His hands fell to Yuri’s shoulders by then, and he used them like a steering wheel to turn Yuri back. “Still keeping that promise?”

Yuri’s eyes wandered between Victor and the entrance before he brushed his thumbs shyly against Victor’s jawline. “I think I’ll need a little more reminding,” he murmured, and smiled against warm lips when Victor quickly obliged.

Outside, Yuko quietly clicked the outer doors shut and set up a sign to block the clear glass window: _Closed for private practice._


End file.
